H.U.G.S. Offers Support for Suicide Loss

A New Support Group in Aberdeen Offers Hope, Guidance, and Community.

By Annie Scott | September/October 2025

H.U.G.S. meetings are open to all suicide loss survivors.

A NEW GROUP FOR SUICIDE LOSS survivors is now available in Aberdeen. H.U.G.S., which stands for Hope Understanding Grief Support, started meeting in March this year. Meetings are held at Conklin Clinics on the second Tuesday of each month from 6:30 to 7:30 PM. Meetings are free to attend.

Six people are on the group’s committee, including Gayla Martens and her daughter Maria, Heather Hedges, Fred Geffre, Lisa Williams, and TJ Steckler.

Geffre had the idea for the group years ago and tried to get a group started before COVID. Other committee members had met and voiced a need for a support group, and planning for the group started in earnest after International Suvrivors of Suicide Loss Day in 2023, which Conklin Clinics has been observing for the past few years.

“The seed was planted in each of us, and the right people got together at the right time,” Martens said.

Meetings are led by survivors. Martens said that Steckler helps steer the conversations and brings up good starting points, especially in the beginning. Each meeting typically begins with a candle lighting. Then members discuss touchstones from the book Understanding Your Grief. Hedges said that sometimes they use holidays or anniversaries of someone they’ve lost as a starting point as well. Speakers have also been invited to speak during meetings.

Gayla Martens, Maria Martens and Fred Geffre.

TJ Steckler, Jeff Williams and Lisa Williams.

Heather Hedges

“Members can be as involved as they want,” Martens said. “People speak from shared experiences. It’s not about advice, but sharing what works for us.”

About ten people regularly attend group meetings. Hedges said that meetings were quiet in the beginning, but as the group as grown, members became more comfortable.

“Our goal is to have more consistency. We want people to be comfortable enough to attend,” she said. “You don’t have to say a word at a meeting. People can just be present.”

“It takes a lot of courage to seek grief support,” Hedges said. “You don’t typically do that right away. For a lot of people, it takes around six months to a year.”

Some churches in town offer a program called GriefShare, but those groups are different from H.U.G.S. Martens said that the grief associated with suicide is different than other losses…